“I hate when a drink separates, and the mixer just sits on the bottom, and then you get a big glob of it at the end. That’s what happened in that thorium mai tai I made last week. But I think in this case it might be worth it, because the cocktail would have a cool glowing color—especially if we went somewhere with a black light. I have an idea: When we take it from Iran, let’s drop a shot glass full of uranium into a pint glass of beer and chug it.” At press time, Hegseth was said to have concluded that the radioactive substance made a decent chaser.