Oh dang. First time? That has to be the most complicated time travel movie ever made.
There were some helpful charts, I think I mostly got it now lol
I kinda just sat there depressed the whole time even though I should be happy. Food was good… I guess… still not good enough to stop the darkness that consumes my souls inside. I told my mom about it and she’s just like “think happy thoughts”… “I occasionally feel depressed too”… ugh she will never understand lol. She told me she loves me like at least 10+ times today… idk, I’m not exactly feeling it… I still feel the fear of being abandoned, of rejection, still fearful they’ll end up betraying me, rejecting me.
We went to a park to just kinda just chill out, take a walk… I kinda just reminicent of old times when we spend time together. Sadly I’m not a kid anymore… although I still kinda acted like a kid today… felt like a kid at heart… I still feel like my inner child is here with me, the flame of joy… sort of… but expectations are different now… future looks scary…
So she just asks me: “do you love us? (“us” as in both of them… dad was also with us)
So idk what to say… felt too vulnerable to open up…
So I just said “you’ll love me regardless, right?”
And she told me “of couse”
Why is this so awkward?
So calm just walking in the park today… like in the eye of the storm, the calm before shit happens again, chaos soon reigns again…
I feel mom will go “bipolar” mode again…
On the way back she mentioned something about inheritance and asked the “am I ready to act normal” question again, and I just feel worried again… sort of ruined the vibe I just had chillng out, walking in the park just earlier.
Just average Chinese Family dynamics… what the fuck
emotions on a rollarcoaster
speaking off I kinda wanna go on a rollarcoaster
probably less scary than family relations…
hows your day?
No way, my parents told me its supposed to be a lucky year…
Maybe I misunderstood?
But again its just religion, its all made up so nothing is ever consistent xD
I don’t think some parents can accept that their kid is depressed. Some parents think if their kid is depressed it is a reflection of themselves and they failed in some way.
But there’s so many heavy, depressing external factors that young people deal with that their parents generation never dealt with. I feel like to be 24 and not at least mildly depressed (or pessimistic) means someone is in denial of reality.
I get the impression from this very small amount of information that she may not be able to fully relate to what you’re feeling. But I like that she said she occasionally feels depressed too. I’ve met people that couldn’t comprehend feeling general sadness. “You don’t have any reason to be down” kind of mentality.
As for spell checking, Microsoft Word, at least when it was more akin to a product, was pretty good at that. There’s also LLMs if you don’t have a problem with them, though I strongly suggest asking multiple ones just in case the one you ask decides to have a fever dream.
As for why wanting to make something, reminds me of the Ancient Greeks, which afaik thought immortality came from being remembered. Dunno if it’d be your case, but I find it an interesting line of thought.
Starbound might be a good call for modding. Minecraft uses Java while Starbound uses LUA, and from my experience, LUA is far more human-readable, which could help mitigate @grumpy404@piefed.zip’s dyslexia-related issues.
As for cooking, it could also be worth videos of the process or other pertinent elements, as well as blog posts.
or just play around with random notes to see what sounds good
FFVII’s One-Winged Angel intensifies
Apparently Nobuo Uematsu made it a few segments at a time, putting them together as they seemed fit.
Met a ten year old who is waaaay better than me at video games, and he only gets to play on Friday evenings. The kids are alright.